STATUS OF SINGLE WOMEN IN INDIA

Since time immemorial, Indian women have suffered at the hands of men. They have been subject to all forms of mental, physical, psychological and emotional torture. However, due to the hard work and dedication of feminists and social reformers, there has been a considerable improvement in the status of women in urban India. Education has helped the urban woman to understand the rights that have been accorded to her by the constitution and she is learning to make full use of it. Besides, she is now financially independent and does not need a man to support her. So she does not need to tolerate any form of torture and has the confidence to fight for her rights. Women have stopped sacrificing their dreams for the happiness of others. They choose to remain single as long as they want to and the divorce rate in India has reached an all time high. Thus, there are a large number of women in our society who are single. But does our society accept single women? The answer is a definite ‘No’.

The life of an urban Indian woman is far from easy. She is expected to have recognized academic and professional qualifications, a good job, stunning looks, polished manners, good communication skills, social contacts and family background. She should be an expert at multi-tasking. She is expected to be perfect by the age of twenty-three / four, because, without the aforementioned qualities, she cannot expect to get an Indian man. The man can be as old as he wishes to be, but his wife should be young. However, not many women manage to acquire the qualities of an ideal urban wife by the age determined by society and remain single. When a fifty-year old man marries a twenty-five year old girl, our society accepts it willingly. But they are shocked when a woman falls in love with a man, couple of years younger than her. She is insulted and derided by everyone. Alas! A spinster is tortured all her life for not finding the right man.

The plight of a married woman is unimaginable. Owing to the high standard of living, most husbands want their wives to work. The wife is expected to look after the house, raise her children and shape their future, satisfy the whims of her mother-in-law and also earn a living. Not all women have these superhuman qualities and sometimes they give up.

As a result of globalization, Indians have started aping the West blindly. They have imbibed all the wrong things. The infidelity rate has gone up. Men love to have young mistresses. However, these days women don’t put up with such humiliation and they walk out on such men. Thus, the divorce rate in India has gone up. A divorced man easily finds another wife but a divorced woman is looked down upon, by society. Children from happier families make fun of her children and her female friends don’t want to be seen with her. Her original family is ashamed of her and if she chooses to live alone, her character becomes the topic of popular discussion. And if the poor thing just about manages to find a respectable man, he becomes the general object of pity, ‘Poor guy, the shameless woman has cast her spell on him’.

The situation of the widowed woman isn’t any better. Her husband’s family inevitably disowns her, because she is not related to them in any way. Besides, she is also believed to have conspired with the forces of nature, to kill her husband. She brings bad luck to the people she associates with and everyone is generally afraid of her. Widow remarriage was made legal way back in 1856, but how many widows in India remarry? Forget marriage, if a widowed woman chooses not wear a doleful expression at all times, that is also considered a sin. Happy people don’t associate with her because she might hurl her bad luck on them.

These days’ people do not reject and ignore these women overtly. It is fashionable to be sensitive. They pretend to be very good, kind and gentle towards them. This hurts more. The rich and the ultra rich have been forced to accept ‘singles’ because there are more number of spinsters and divorced women in these classes. So, the level of discrimination faced by single women who belong to these classes is lesser than that faced by their counterparts in the middle and low income groups. The truth is clear; our society in general, still finds it hard to accept a woman without a man.